Day 46 – Backsliding

Hey there! So, in the beginning of this journey, it was difficult. The month of January was hard. I stopped sugar, dairy, grain, breads, simple carbs and potatoes! I felt so good the whole entire month. It’s February 11th and 46 days into this deal, and I have been eating like CRAP the past couple of weeks, slowly but surely incorporating the dairy, grains and breads back in my diet! I have no one to blame but myself. I make the choices, and I am reaping the consequences. I haven’t had sugar/sweets mind you, however, I have not been treating my body like the temple it is. It’s laziness! Pure laziness! I have been placing myself in tempting situations and partaking! Eating out, eating cheese, eating food that I KNOW is not good for me! Why do I do this? It’s too much at one time. Its too hard to do ALL of that at once. The sugar was bad enough!

In AA it’s called “slipping” or “relapse.” I see myself making these choices and if I continue, it’s just a matter of time before I pick up a piece of cookie or cake and go for it. Just a matter of time. I feel like CRAP, because I have been eating CRAP food! So, the point is, what am I going to do about it? Starting tomorrow, because the food intake today is over at this point, I am going to cut out ONE thing, and continue on. I am going to choose the breads and grains. I feel like I am going to have a PITA baby right now! I have eaten bread all week, everyday! Not very much, mind you, but it doesn’t take much! My body does NOT like it, I hurt, the inflammation is amazing and it doesn’t help that I am sore from the gym as well! I am going to go for a month without breads/grains in addition to the sugar that I am abstaining from already. Then, I will incorporate one more item after the month of no bread/grains. The dairy, mainly cheese because that’s really all the dairy I consume.

I think this is totally doable and I feel like I can stick with it, long term. I don’t want to fail at this, and I want to be successful at the SugarSobriety. I need to be successful at other things as well in the process. The whole purpose of this journey was to get healthy and if I don’t FEEL healthy, guess what? I am NOT healthy! Our bodies are amazing at telling us what’s going on – most of the time, we do not listen! Sacred self care. It can elude me at times. I crawl in bed some nights so tired and exhausted that I have a hard time falling asleep. If I perform some sort of sacred self care, sleep doesn’t hide from me. It comes easily and I awake feeling refreshed and rested.

Nike’s motto is Just Do It, and that is exactly what I am going to start tomorrow. Just do it, and move on. No beating myself up, no bitching about it, no whining. Just do it. I hope you have a great night and I am grateful you are on this journey with me.

Until tomorrow……..

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